learning to be patient today.

and to give grace just as freely as i’ve received it.

——

also some here are some thoughts on affirmation, as per rick warren:

We affirm people when we treat them with dignity, knowing that they matter to God. If you want to stand out in your leadership, one secret puts you head and shoulders above everybody else – be an encourager. Encouragement is very difficult to find today.  The Bible says, “Encourage each other and build each other up.”

In America, we live in a very negative culture.  Most people get far more jeers than cheers, far more pokes than strokes.  We live in a society where the number one form of humor is put downs.  People are put down, criticized, maligned.

God calls us to do the exact opposite.  God says, as believers and especially as Pastors and church leaders, we are to value everybody.  When you look around at people — even people who are insulting you and putting you down, you must realize that God died for them.  He sent His Son for them and they matter greatly to God.  When you appreciate people, you raise their value.  Appreciation means to raise in value.  If you have bought or sold real estate in these last few years, you know the meaning of appreciation.  Every time you appreciate somebody you raise their value.

How can you affirm people?

  • By noticing them.
  • By listening to them.
  • By applauding their contributions.
  • By being interested in more than just their work and ministry but also their life beyond church.
  • By including them in events rather than excluding them.

Here are three specific ways to affirm people, right out of the Scriptures…

Listen to them.

“Share each other’s troubles and problems, and in this way obey the law of Christ.”

- Galatians 6:2 (NLT)

One of the greatest gifts you can give people is an attentive ear.  When you listen to someone it says “You matter.  I value what you have to say.  I value who you are.  I think what you have to say is important.”  Every time you genuinely listen to people, you’re ministering to them. By listening, I show I care.  It says by doing this you obey the law of Christ, also called the great commandment… “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 

Use positive words.

“Speak only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs [not your needs, but theirs] that it may benefit those who listen.”

- Ephesians 4:29 (NIV)

God wants us, as believers, to be people builders not people users.  Most of the world is filled with people users.  God says that when you speak positive words of encouragement to people and you build them up, you’re ministering to people.

Would you like to know how to change somebody who doesn’t want to change?  Treat them the way you want them to become as if they have already become it.  That’s called speaking in faith.  People tend to live up to our expectations of them. The other night   saw Sally Fields in an interview.  She was talking about how one director in one play said, “That was brilliant!” and it gave her the confidence to become an actress.  Just one little compliment can change a life.

You don’t know the power of your words.  If people make any effort toward the Lord, commend them on that.  If they make any effort to being more mature, more productive, whatever… when you see something good in their life, compliment it and that area will grow.  What you compliment tends to grow.

Pray for them.

“You are helping us by praying for us.”

- 2 Corinthians 1:11 (NLT)

Make a prayer list of the people you lead.  Now put it in your Bible or keep it handy on your mobile device. Pray for them and watch what happens in your church.  You cannot pray for people and not see them start to change.  And I encourage you to tell them you’re praying for them.  You can even ask them, “What do you want me to pray about?”  Even unbelievers appreciate people praying for them.  Every time you do that you’re building a bridge on which you can minister to people.

Write down a person you will, this week, encourage.  You will affirm them either through positive words or listening to them or praying for them.  Write down the names of a few people and encourage them, and then encourage them to encourage others.


But really. #lebron #cavs #meh #bullsalltheway

But really. #lebron #cavs #meh #bullsalltheway



Haaappiest of birthdays to my little sis!! U da best! throwback to the day you were born.

Haaappiest of birthdays to my little sis!! U da best! throwback to the day you were born.


india trip adventures! #india #waterfall #adventures #summer #vacay #motherland #mothernature #beautiful #travels #latergram #instagood #instamood #igdaily

india trip adventures! #india #waterfall #adventures #summer #vacay #motherland #mothernature #beautiful #travels #latergram #instagood #instamood #igdaily


castles and oceans and stuff. #dubai #travels #castle #ocean #beach #instagood #instamood #igdaily #worldtravels #vacay #summer


Love hanging out with this little #monkey!! #summer #weekend #kiddies #cutie #downtown #chicagosummers #chicago #chitown #beautifulday #lovehim #goofball #allsmiles #fun #fambam #family #familia #funday #happy #instagood #instagood #igdaily  (at Millenium Park Chicago)

Love hanging out with this little #monkey!! #summer #weekend #kiddies #cutie #downtown #chicagosummers #chicago #chitown #beautifulday #lovehim #goofball #allsmiles #fun #fambam #family #familia #funday #happy #instagood #instagood #igdaily (at Millenium Park Chicago)


This is today.

This is today.


A #tbt tribute to #dilloday ‘12 #concert #summer #college #steveaoki #memories #nu #northwestern #throwback #throwbackthursday #summernights #gettingold #instagood #instamood #igdaily

A #tbt tribute to #dilloday ‘12 #concert #summer #college #steveaoki #memories #nu #northwestern #throwback #throwbackthursday #summernights #gettingold #instagood #instamood #igdaily


When I go home for the summer and go to church with my parents




Getting ready to see wicked!! #wicked #newyork #vacay #vacation #girlsnight #Broadway #alldolledup #instamood #instagood #igdaily #friends #sisters #prettyladies  (at Gershwin Theatre)

Getting ready to see wicked!! #wicked #newyork #vacay #vacation #girlsnight #Broadway #alldolledup #instamood #instagood #igdaily #friends #sisters #prettyladies (at Gershwin Theatre)



nostalgia is tiresome

attached is an email that a friend sent me last night. it was a much needed reminder that friendships/relationships matter. you may never fully know the impact you’ve had on someone’s life; your words and actions may be long remembered, even after the friendship has faded. 

The other funny thing about relationships is that even though they’re hard and painful and can really suck at times, I believe its one of God’s most effective means at giving us a glimpse of how powerful redemption really is.

Pssst! Today is my birthday. My SPECIAL birthday (turning 26 on 26th). Get your last minute good wishes in. 

In the first hour of my birthday (1 am), I was reading through all the birthday cards, graduation cards, random letters that I got from friends starting from more than 10 years ago until now. It’s awesome reading their words and how much heart they poured out for me into these letters and cards. Reading them made me miss them so much and made me wish I had kept in touch with all of them. There were letters from friends that I cut off ties with, not because they were bad friends, but because I was selfish and stupid. I hope they can forgive me. 

As for others, I wish I had more time to keep in touch. In the cards that congratulated me on my graduation (college), there were many empty promises to visit and talk every day and keep in touch. At the time, I thought these would be promises that we could keep, but now I know I was being slightly naive. No accusations here! Not at all. Just wish we had unlimited time to give love and receive it to the fullest. 

Nostalgia is tiresome. 

A lesson I learned from this is that we should keep writing to people we love. Keep writing cards, keep writing letters and really give your all when you’re doing it. Don’t ever think what you write is too sappy or worry that they might take it the wrong way (I worry about this a lot). And when you get these cards and letters, keep them forever.

There’s nothing more amazing than seeing how others saw you at your best.

Or that even at your worst, they treasured you.

Even when you felt invisible, they saw you. 

So thank you everyone who at one point wrote notes, letters, cards, random post its for me. Even if I don’t talk to you now, I read what you said and I thank you for writing that for me. If it wasn’t exactly what I needed to hear then, it’s exactly what I wanted to hear now.